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When Declarative Language Activates The Nervous System

Season #2

In this insightful episode, Kristy explores the complex interactions between declarative language and the nervous system in individuals with PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance). She delves into the often misunderstood dynamics of communication strategies and their unintended impacts on anxiety and trust.

The discussion begins by addressing the intuitive intelligence of children with PDA, who may perceive declarative language as a mere strategy, thus heightening their anxiety and resistance. Kristy emphasizes the importance of building trust and genuine connections rather than relying on direct or scripted communication, which can come across as inauthentic and exacerbate hypervigilance.

A significant portion of the conversation focuses on the real-life implications of using declarative language, such as managing daily routines like nasal spray usage for hay fever. Kristy highlights how even well-intentioned suggestions can trigger defensive reactions, underscoring the need for transparency and honesty in interactions.

Moreover, Kristy thoughtfully examines the broader societal pressures that influence parental behaviour and the pursuit of "correct" methods. She encourages a shift towards more authentic, relationship-focused approaches that prioritize long-term trust over immediate compliance.

Listeners are left with a powerful message about the value of acknowledging efforts, both of themselves and their children, in navigating the delicate balance of support and independence. This episode not only provides practical advice but also offers a deep understanding of the emotional landscape of families dealing with PDA, promoting a compassionate and informed approach to parenting and interpersonal relationships.