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Reflections

 

 

 

 

 

Why Easter can feel so hard for my family

 

If you, or your family are really struggling right now over the Easter break, I want to share that this is very common for PDAers.
 

This is when as a PDAer myself, I know that my nervous system is...

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Instead of trying to get my child off screens, I started making the rest of the house worth coming out for

Uncategorized Mar 28, 2026

I used to fight screens.

I'd set timers. I'd negotiate. I'd try to lure them away with activities, outings, suggestions. "Why don't you come and do something with me?" "You've been on that for hours....

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"I want to try school again..."

When we’re raising PDA kids, or any kids with school-related trauma, one of the hardest moments can be when they say:

“I want to try school again.”

On the surface, that might sound hopeful. Brave. Promi...

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Listening to the children who resist

It is remarkable how often adults express confusion or indignation when children, particularly children labelled pathologically demand avoidant or oppositionally defiant (note - those who resist and/o...

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PDAers often struggle with being perceived

PDAers often struggle with being perceived.

By that I don’t simply mean being seen. I mean the experience of someone observing, interpreting, forming conclusions, or assuming meaning about what we’re...

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"What are your qualifications, really?"

 

I’m asked often about my qualifications. In fact, just yesterday someone asked if I had “any actual qualifications or is it all just personal experience?”

 

I don't typically answer this. But her...

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Lay the flowers at your own feet

 

I would sob in isolation, convinced I didn’t know how to raise my children correctly because I was looking for the ‘right’ (safest, socially acceptable) answer.

I would criticize myself, reject mysel...

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